so i've taken up a couple of hours or so to actually begin this blog and i've started to understand that i need this. I need to face this. I can't run away from what i need to overcome.
and it's just about everything. from that moment, things began shaking. I trembled, fearing the worst and because of that fear i knew emotions were going to take over. And they did...
dance, life, everything... meant nothing.
i felt that i had failed, and that nothing whatsoever had even an ounce of meaning. What was i left to do? i asked... i begged... pleaded... spoke in anger... and nothing... but i knew it wasn't just nothing. He was there... listening... he was always there... listening and waiting for me to speak to him. And that's all that he ever wanted from me. He wanted to communicate. Communicate through prayer whether it be through anger or a simple hello, he was pleased to know that i still remembered that he was there.
and i remembered. and no longer can i let this all get me down. I'm glad i took the day off work to not do anything. i needed this time to realise who i am and what i intend to avoid becoming. No longer will i be who you fear i am. I am and always be the person you knew i was the time you loved me the most. And that is who i am. And who i love to be. and i know this isn't going to be easy as things have already begun to change... and honestly... change is something i'm not usually good at, but i have a choice and i want to adapt.
and 2day is not the day to stop... it's time to make things happen.
'cause i'm leaving on a jet plane... dont' know when i'll be back again' 3 weeks... till LA. and i wanna make the most of it. i wanna come back a better person... for myself, for you and for everyone.
this is it. and all we have... have had... dw. those things that hurt won't haunt me no more. Just wanna let you know that those moments have always been beautiful to me. No more fighting, cause its tearing us apart. so let's start over... new beginning/s.
... and dance must live on. It means too much to me... and knowing me... signs are always beautiful and ever so helpful. so your msg was unexpected. I knew i had to live in this moment. and i will...
oh... and i found this inspirational quote. i like it =] *trev gives thumbs up*
"Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly." - Robert Francis Kennedy.
so all this... this time that feels wasted... only convinces me that greater things must be beyond what i cannot see. Life is tough, and as always... we are given struggles because GOD knows we are strong. He knows that we must struggle to become great and that this is the only way that we will truly understand what we living for. So don't ever feel that things are impossible and that nothing can be done.
we create the world we live in. It's time to live with purpose. =]
“If it is your time, love will track you down like a cruise missile.” Lynda Barry
No comments:
Post a Comment